South Park Season 20: Cartman’s Master Plan?

Have you noticed something strange going on in South Park season 20?

No I don’t mean the Danish troll hunters or Dildo Swaggins, I mean Cartman.

In this series, he’s been quiet and reserved. He’s been emotional and he’s been sincere. This goes against everything we know about Matt Stone and Trey Parker’s cartoon devil child.

Something is definitely up.

South Park Season 20 Cartman So Far

Let’s assess the strange behaviour of one Eric T. Cartman in South Park season 20. He has:

• Genuinely offered support to the girls, claiming they are smart, funny and cool

• Fought against trolling that he would normally have found hilarious

• Not retaliated after the boys destroyed his favourite tech

• Formed a real relationship with somebody for non-nefarious reasons

• Appeared to be boyish and innocent on almost every occasion he is on-screen

• Hasn’t got involved in the boy vs girl war, despite being a warmongering sociopath

After watching this little horror destroy those around him for nearly 20 years, I am just not buying it. Cartman is up to something.

Consider how he reacted when Scott Tenorman sold him pubes. Yet he does nothing when his laptop and gaming gear is ruthlessly torn apart?

Remember his plot to defeat P.C Principal by trying to frame him for raping Butters, or when he gave Kyle H.I.V? How about when he turned the ginger kids into an army, when he tried to take over the world with the evil God Cthulu, or that time he created an underground fighting league of crack babies?

The Cartman we are seeing is not the Cartman we know. Or is it?

Where It All Begins

Throughout the series run so far — 8 episodes — Cartman has been pretty chill. All except for when he finds out about the trolls potentially releasing his Ghostbuster email, but we’ll get to that later.

However, when he turns to Butters for help, Butters remarks that Cartman has gotten weak.

But that is exactly what he wants us to think…

Cartman is a manipulator, a con-artist and an evil genius. We are seeing him as a weakling, a shell of his former self, because that is exactly what he wants us to see.

In South Park season 20 Cartman is deliberately trying to remain in the background, despite often taking a major role as an antagonist in other seasons.

Why?

One word: Mars

Cartman’s Masterplan

Cartman is desperate to go to Mars. He daydreams about bouncing around on it and has clearly been talking about how awesome it is with his girlfriend Heidi.

Getting there, however, was never going to be easy.

He has no money, he has no rocket and he has no time. Elon Musk’s company, SpaceX, are currently planning to have a colony up and running in 50-100 years or so, but for Cartman that won’t be quick enough — he may even be dead by the time it happens.

He needs to accelerate their plans if he’s to live on the Red Planet. And if we know one thing about Cartman. Once he sets his mind on something, nothing is going to stop him…

So, how does he get to Mars? Simple: He destroys the continental United States, the world following shortly after.

I’ve lost you, right? Hear me out.

Randy remarks that Member Berries have existed throughout history, crippling empires by forcing them to go backwards, eventually leading to their demise. This time, it all started with J.J Abrams, and now it’s going nationwide.

Here’s my theory: Cartman knows what is going on with the Member Berries, and actually introduced them to J.J.

Somehow, he discovered the existence of Member Berries, maybe on some online conspiracy chatroom. With the people of America getting frustrated with political correctness in the last season, he saw the chance to crumble the country and send it into ruin. He found a way of cultivating Member Berries and began the fall of the greatest nation on Earth.

As the country disintegrates — then the world — the brightest minds will be forced to speed up their Mars plans to escape the onslaught and he, as a selfless and progressive guy who is totally not fat, will join them.

Crazy theory right? Let’s look at the statements we made earlier:

• Genuinely offered support to the girls, claiming they are both smart, funny and cool
• What it means: A number of the biggest minds behind SpaceX are women, including its CEO, Gwynne Shotwell.

• Fought against trolling that he would normally have found hilarious
• What it means: Solidify his place as a feminist and progressivist — deep cover

• Not retaliated after the boys destroyed his favourite tech
• What it means: Why would he bother retaliating when he doesn’t need to? He said it himself, there is no wifi on Mars

• Formed a real relationship with somebody for non-nefarious reasons
• What it means: She showed him her vagina…

• Appeared to be boyish and innocent on almost every occasion he is on-screen
• What it means: Keep out of the limelight, ensuring no risk of being kept from his primary goal

• Hasn’t got involved in the boy vs girl war, despite being a warmongering sociopath
• What it means: Has no interest in Earthly conflicts. He won’t be around to see them

We also see the first glimpse of his plan in episode 7 of South Park season 20. With things going to shit, he immediately heads for SpaceX. This wasn’t a whim, he hasn’t been thinking about Mars randomly, it’s been his plan all along.

So why does Cartman want to go to Mars?

We see Cartman’s vision of a super-cool Mars, where everything is totally sweet. What we do know about Cartman is that he is utterly self-indulgent and will do almost anything to benefit himself.

I honestly think he cultivated and caused the Member Berry chaos because he thinks Mars is totally bitchin’, nothing more. If you think that sounds ridiculous, just remember, this is Cartman we are talking about.

What Cartman Didn’t Count On

In his vision of a beautiful Mars, we see things quickly fall apart. A massive storm destroys everything he wants.

That metaphorical storm was caused by something he didn’t foresee: Trolls.

Through his advocacy of women’s rights and Token, Gerald’s trolling allowed Cartman an opportunity to repair his reputation as a young Hitler. A reputation which would almost certainly deny him the chance to become a Mars colonist.

However, after things got out of hand, he was presented with another opportunity. Instead of having to repair his reputation, he would prove his advocacy of women through his girlfriend Heidi. Ever wonder why he’s so keen to tell her how smart and funny she is? She even quotes him on it, like it’s ingrained in her head. His plan is working…

But then things fell apart.

The trolls are threatening to release data about Cartman, potentially destroying his relationship and, more importantly, proving he is a misogynist and not worthy of a trip to Mars. Notice Cartman’s anger towards Butters in episode 8. He tells him he can’t just change on a dime and be allowed to go to Mars. This is something he clearly believes, explaining many of his actions.

Cartman isn’t terrified by the idea of losing Heidi, he’s terrified by the idea of her no longer being his ticket to Mars. And that is where we are now. Cartman has been forced to attempt to join the SpaceX program ahead of schedule, but will it work?

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