The Top 10 Fish Cartoon Characters In Cinema History

    Give a person a fish, they eat for a day. Teach a person to fish? They’re going to pull in the top 10 fish cartoon characters in cinema history, and who can blame them?

    Let’s be grateful we’re talking about creatures that live in the water, because we’re all about to get thirsty.

    These aren’t your Long John Silvers’ fish sticks, they’re not your local pub’s fish and chips. These are gilled creatures you want to smash like you were brawling with Mario and Pikachu. Or maybe it’s just a tongue-in-cheek article to make you laugh while you’re on the tube/toilet. Either way, your eyes are in for a seafood feast that even Poseidon himself would envy.

    animated fish

    Aquaman, Justice League/Various (played by Jason Momoa)

    We’re starting you off in the shallow end of the pool with an obvious choice: Jason Mamoa’s Aquaman. First appearing in Joss Whedon’s Justice League, a movie pretty much universally panned except for this hot piece of fish tail right here, he’s been making waves with audiences since the Conan remake and his Game of Thrones roles, but he truly became a household name with this wet and wild role. You know you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to share a long piece of kelp with him, eating from opposite ends a la Lady and the Tramp.

    Mer-Man, Zoolander (played by Ben Stiller)

    While this movie only features Mer-Man Derek Zoolander for a little bit, the impact he made on our hearts and other parts is impossible to measure. If I was in charge of the script, the movie would’ve been Aquariumlander with Mer-Men and Mermaids with Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Will Ferrell, and the rest of the cast in fishtails the entire time. In the film, Derek sees himself in his Mer-Man ad as he tries to forget about his modeling career. In the ad, he says, “wetness is the essence of beauty”, predicting this list way ahead of its time. One of the funniest fish movies ever made.

    Lola, Shark Tale (voiced by Angelina Jolie)

    Sending thrills and chills to your gills, up next is Angelina Jolie’s uncanny valley femme fish-tale, Lola from Shark Tale. Someone, somewhere thought up the idea, “what if we took big names in Hollywood like Jolie and Will Smith then turned them into sexy aquatic creatures?” Whoever that man, woman, or plankton is, I want to shake their fin, because damn, have you seen the lips on this fish? They give real Jolie’s lips a run for her sand dollars.

    Mrs Puff, Spongebob Squarepants (voiced by Mary Jo Catlett)

    We’re not talking about this or this… we’re talking about this. Mrs. Puff is a thicc pufferfish who will make anyone sing Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher”. She’s Bikini Bottom’s most eligible bachelorette with charms so undeniable, even Mr. Krabs opens his wallet to shower her in gifts in the “Krusty Love” episode. Real pufferfish are often toxic if you ingest them, but who wouldn’t die for a taste of this underwater hotty? I’d even let Spongebob Squarepants drive me around for some of that sweet Puff.

    Bruce The Shark, Finding Nemo (voiced by Barry Humphries)

    Sharks are perfect partners – so many rows of teeth for love bites. Bruce the Shark, from Pixar’s fish movie Finding Nemo and named after Jaws‘ prop shark, is no exception. He’s big, he’s a health-conscious vegetarian, and he’s great with kids. He’s got the bad boy looks with a golden heart and some real big shark dick energy. Plus, who can resist a shark with an Australian accent?

    Ariel, The Little Mermaid (voiced by Jodi Benson)

    Haunting the dreams of anyone who grew up watching the Little Mermaid with her siren song, Ariel makes the list as the hottest fish character in a Disney movie. She’s a fiery redhead with a shell bra and a total babe. In fact, her whole family is hot – King Triton has nipples on his pecs that could cut glass. In the beloved Disney fish film, she risks it all to get some lovin’ from a human, so we know our readers are at least partially her type. In the end, she even becomes fully human, avoiding the problem that plagued  Futurama’s Fry; “Why couldn’t she be the other kind of mermaid; with the fish part on top and the lady part on the bottom?” Just don’t look up what happens to her in the original Hans Christian Andersen story.

    Larry the Lobster, Spongebob Squarepants (voiced by Mr. Lawrence)

    When big Larry came ‘round just to put him down, Spongebob turned into a clown, and I melted into a puddle of hot boiling lobster love. Larry the Lobster is the biggest muscle daddy in Bikini Bottom, and his persona screams power bottom. He may not be the most famous fish character, but he can get it. I write fan mail to Spongebob creator Stephen Hillenburg every day hoping he’ll set me up with this ripped crustacean, but all I get back is a reminder of the restraining order he took out against me. Doesn’t he know we all want to see this tasty meal covered in a wedge of lemon and butter and served with a few new potatoes? Life is hard for us fish freaks.

    Kit Fisto, Star Wars, Episode II: Attack of the Clones (played by Zachariah Jensen)

    What phrase comes to mind when you think of the Star Wars prequels? Worst movies ever, right? For one reason only: they killed the sexy, tentacle-haired Nautolan before he had a shirtless scene. I will forever hold a grudge against George Lucas for this. Luckily, he’s minorly atoned for this crime against his fanbase by including Kit Fisto in the Star Wars spin-off Clone Wars cartoons. I just want to reenact the infamous Japanese octopus painting, Dream of a Fisherman’s Wife, with his hair. Is that too much to ask?

    Hot Squidward, Spongebob Squarepants (voiced by Rodger Bumpass)

    You didn’t think we’d end this list without including this cranky, clarinet-playing bad boy? He even has hot in his name. Hot Squidward is the Mona Lisa of animated fish. The creators of the show knew that fans were drooling any time old Squiddles came on the screen, and they gave us this tempting piece of tentacled fan service right here. Who cares if his looks only came from a horrible accident? Sometimes you gotta suffer for beauty, baby. His suffering paid off, as this iteration of this intellectual cephalopod became a meme with staying power.

    Goldeen, Pokemon (voiced by Rachael Lillis ((English version))

    In my most recent text to Goldeen, I told her, “there may be over 900 Pokemon, but you’re the only one I need.” I know, I know what you’re thinking – 1) that’s pretty corny, and 2) police, help, this man on the internet is lusting after an actual fish. However, I need to remind you that this is a silly list meant to make you laugh, and I’ve lost all control over my life due to my obsession with this pocket monster. Please, send help or send me this foxy water type.

    Who did we miss? Who’s the hottest fish in the world? Let us know in the comments, sailor!

    If you enjoyed this article, check out more of our movie content!

    Jon Holmes
    Jon Holmes
    Jon Holmes is a writer based in the UK. Alongside his work writing for film, he is a multi-accoladed filmmaker in his own right, and also performs. He can be followed on Youtube at Hans HS and on Twitter on @jonnyjonjon1

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